“Once you learn to read, you will be forever free.” – Frederick Douglas
There is an ache of sadness to the goodbyes I must make to the books and materials I’ve now been privileged to use with all seven of my children. I have caught myself multiple times in the past months thinking, “I should jot this down for the next time I have to teach this” or “when I get to this chapter again, here’s an important note I’ll be sure to make to the kids.” All of a sudden, it seems, I will not be “jotting this down” or “making this note” again. Because it’s over and done. It’s behind me now. I have taught many things for the last time. The youngest one of my littles has learned these things, her big brown eyes intent on my face, absorbing the details I’ve always given without the consideration that one day they will all have been spoken. I thought I would be doling out those details forever. Once upon a time, it felt like forever until I would be “done” with this or that. And now, after what seems like an eternity of teaching my little ones to read, I am packing up my All About Reading Level 1 materials and passing them along to a friend. Tirzah is going into Level 2 without a backward glance, and I’m kind of breathless at how quickly it happened. How was it so fast? How did those endless moments of painstakingly sounding out each syllable and phonogram just end without me even realizing it was happening? I think I almost can hear the years slipping by.
There is nothing like the freedom I hand to my children by giving them the gift of reading. With all the stops and starts, different learning styles, slow beginnings, and even slower days of pushing through the silent e, it is the one thing I have accomplished in my homeschooling that feels truly successful. It is one of only a few things of permanence the children will take with them, moreso than the history projects or geography maps or composer appreciation unit studies we do. Reading is a launchpad to all of learning and living. A child who cannot read is most cruelly shut off from the world. Mothers used to teach their children to read using only the Bible. A Bible was often a most-prized family possession. It was considered to be so important that old Bibles have places to record family histories – births, deaths, marriages, etc. I have my great-grandmother’s Bible, her beautiful scrawling script listing important family details. Now we have the luxury of reading curriculum tailored particularly to the way children’s brains develop, and endless supplies of letter tiles and colorful controlled vocabulary readers. While I recognize that the importance of reading goes far beyond my children’s walk with their heavenly Abba, I have never forgotten that the main book I care that they read even if they never read anything else is the Word of God. It is one of the main purposes of our homeschooling journey as a family – to raise up children who can dive into the treasures of Scripture and glean richly over and over again throughout their entire lives. Though we have many hundreds of books in our library in addition to our Bibles, I celebrate Ketziah coming to the end of All About Reading Level 4, knowing that she can now pick up any Bible, flip to any page, and read. Her whole destiny is changed because she can read.
Today’s tears at realizing the solemn quiet that so many things have as they go away forever from my life leave me yearning to take each boring daily moment and squeeze the life out of it. With a smile, I listened to the girls prattle on about what kind of special coffee drink they wanted from Ziggi’s to commemorate their graduation from their respective reading levels. “Mom, I want a caramel latte. A latte, okay?” “Mom, will you make sure it has lots of caramel chunks on top?” I marvel at God’s goodness in not letting my babies stay babies. They are growing like weeds and I am so grateful. As we had our *coffee-free* drinks on the front steps, I was struck by something new I’m learning (from a wonderful new friend, no less) even in this season of goodbyes. When I offered to hand off this reading curriculum to her, she said, “Are you sure you don’t want to save this for your grandchildren?” My whole heart leaped at the sentiment. Though I see the days of an empty nest rushing at me way too swiftly, much more quickly than I believe I could be ready for, there is the promise that my life and influence go on into the next generation. Right now even the idea of grandchildren is only a hopeful dream, one that seems almost too gloriously beautiful to consider. But we know completely and undeniably in our very bones how quickly children grow up! That season truly will be here before I know it. God convicted my heart quite some time ago that letting go of curriculum for a friend who could use it now (rather than leave it on a shelf unused) was a way to be generous with what God has given me, so saving the reading materials wasn’t really something I had ever considered. The books will go to my friend, but the gem she planted in my heart will remain. How incredible to think that my teaching and sharing wisdom has the opportunity to go on long after the books are closed in my humble little home school.
Until then, I will be cherishing the time of taking the girls onto my lap to snuggle with a family Bible story, even though they can read it on their own now.
Hebron Heights Academy 